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He just lied (and really fast) about being with a male friend at lunch and calling him…but no guy talks to another guy like he was talking.Red alert, I called my sister and she told me how to check a cell phone. I checked his phone when he got home, and there were three messages from other woman, one a stripper.One was even his secretary letting him know another woman had called and he needed to call her back.I thought his secretary was my friend, so hearing that voice mail really hurt.We played this perfect family, but I wasn’t playing, I worked and loved hard. He has to have admiration of others, and women are easy. He also has no regard for others (empathy) and no qualms at all lying and looking you straight in the eyes, daily, even with proof in your hands. He uses people for his own gratification, not one person means anything to him except for how they can make him feel. When I kept finding more and more concrete proof and he could no longer lie, he got violent because he was discovered and I required he get help, that was the only way I would consider not filing for divorce.He hit and pushed and lost it instead, he blamed, he belittled me, he did the most cruel things to me to try and bait me so he could blame me…actually tried several times to force me to react, so he could make me the cause of divorce, so he could even have me jailed.and the horrible insults, his leaving for days at a time as I found affairs, more and more, I finally filed for divorce.
When I found out he was married that first year and confronted him, the reason he said he lied was that the woman who introduced us had gone out with him and he had never told her he was married. etc…made excuses for who I thought was a normal person who made grave mistakes. I did not know people could lie daily and pretend so well….. He meant to call another woman he had just met out.”…got angry when I calmly told him it was me, who did he mean to call.Turns out everyone at his company knows he was a player.When I called his family for help to help him, his sister immediately blamed me and stated that it takes two the make infidelity happen.
One woman I contacted and she filled me in, horrified because he told her we were in a bad marriage and so on…..