Love dating and marriage by george b eager
“Miss Davis has been very sad about the whole thing,” says her lawyer, Harold Schiff. writes or says, Mother has been devoted to that family.” The man who survived five tempestuous years, from 1945 to 1950, as Davis’ third husband takes a harsher view. ’ She told me there was room for only one star in this family.” Perhaps inevitably there were bitter fights, and during one, Sherry threw a “small steamer trunk” at Davis. She realized I wasn’t someone she could manipulate, although she never stopped trying.” The next Mr. “I cannot say I saw anything but love on Bette’s part.” R. Wagner, who produced and starred in Madame Sin with Bette, observes that “motherhood was her thing.Davis’ son, Michael, a Boston attorney who is running for his second term as a member of the Brookline Board of Selectmen, fears that the book may be emotionally—and possibly physically—hazardous to his mother. William Grant Sherry, 70, a landscape painter in Mill Valley, Calif., succeeded Harmon Nelson, the band leader Davis married at age 24, and businessman Arthur Farnsworth, who died two years after their 1941 wedding. Davis, Michael’s father, Gary Merrill, is slightly more sympathetic to Bette—though not to Sherry. She couldn’t have been more generous or caring.” The dynamics of mothering are of major interest to B.The book, My Mother’s Keeper (William Morrow & Company, Inc., .95), hits stores nationwide this week, just in time for Mother’s Day, and the publishing community is salivating over perhaps the juiciest entry on the spring lists. “My mother is not, though she certainly has the capacity to be very mean when crossed.” Already, says B. Why this bright, self-possessed and seemingly guileless housewife would write such a book is the talk of Hollywood.Meanwhile the author, steeling herself to face a hostile, disbelieving press soon on a 12-city promotional tour, insists that her opus is not really like Christina Crawford’s. D., Davis has shown her wrath over what is undeniably an extreme and puzzling act. I’m a very famous woman,” Bette repeatedly protested in letters and phone calls. To publicly malign a mother, let alone one of Davis’ stature, is a chilling act. faces censure from her mother’s fans—not to mention the possibility of a lawsuit or disinheritance—but is undaunted.Struck anew by her mother’s pugnaciousness, she returned to her 38-acre farm in rural northeastern Pennsylvania and decided to write a memoir. proceeded to write, but, perhaps for obvious reasons, she questioned whether she really wanted to publish. They selected Freeport, Grand Bahama, because of its Pentacostal Church and good private school. and Jeremy plan to devote themselves to a second book. “We have a Holy Ghost writer.” As they face the future, they may need a guardian angel.Husband Jeremy, who has had various jobs over the years, including running a hay-trucking business and trading commodity futures on the Chicago board, agreed to act as informal editor. Then, one snowy January night in 1984, a man came to their door selling coupons for the local chamber of commerce. Living the island idyll in a simple, furnished, four-bedroom apartment, B. and Jeremy spend the hours after school snorkeling and spearfishing with the boys. Proceeding without a contract, they are chronicling the events in their lives during and after the writing of My Mother’s Keeper. “The first precept of any religion is honor thy father and mother,” says Gena Rowlands, who played Davis’ daughter in the 1979 TV movie Strangers: The Story of a Mother and Daughter. “I wrote the book because I love her and I want to reach her,” B. What is seen by the world is the most important thing to Mother. Everyone has always tried to get me.” Men were especially threatening to Davis, says B. D.’s governess and Bette with her All About Eve co-star, Gary Merrill, whom she married in 1950.This is essentially a public letter to my mother.” Out of this “desperate solution to a desperate problem” will come, she hopes, a reconciliation. I think she can change and try and understand and rebuild a mother-daughter relationship.” She admits, however, that at first Davis will be enraged when—and if—she reads My Mother’s Keeper. D., perhaps because Bette’s own father had abandoned her when she was 8 years old. Gary would glare at me, face contorted into a vicious mask, and shout, “Get away from me and mind your own business, you little slut, or I’ll give you the same as your mother!
To celebrate these two momentous occasions, here are 15 things that I wish the 15 year-old Therese had known about love. Being skipped over, ignored, and invisible as guys scramble to impress the big-breasted, bodacious blonde bombshell to your right is one of the worst feelings in the world. I want you to know: you are infinitely precious and worthy of receiving love, just for being . The right guy will see — and value — and cherish — your depth. Demand nothing less than honesty and respect and consideration, and what you’ll get. Save yourself from the needless, hairpulling analysis. And getting deeply familiar with and curious about them instead of going batsh*t crazy? That feeling of wanting to be with him every chance you get and “I can’t wait to kiss you again”? Entertain the idea that real love is less of an obsession with the other person than it is an acknowledgement of the other’s inherently precious nature and an unconditional regard for his or her well-being (and for that of the relationship).
There men out there who will, but you’ve got to carve out space for them first. You deserve a relationship in which you feel safe speaking up and getting your needs met (and vice versa).
Direct, honest communication, and simplicity, not complexity, are key. You’ve spent most of your dating years in relationships (or if you were single, you spent your nights looking for a boyfriend), but believe me when I say that some of the best years of your twenties will be the years you spend on your own, not needing or desperately seeking for a dude to make you happy and whole. If he’s not texting you back, calling you, poking you on Facebook (is that still a thing? He’s just not that into you, and it doesn’t matter why.
She persistently demanded to see the manuscript and was told that she’d have to wait till the book was finished. D.) At one point, while she was filming a TV movie, Murder With Mirrors, in England, the actress, according to her daughter, asked a doctor to call B. and report that Davis had taken to her bed and was in danger of another stroke. To do so during her lifetime, some would say, is cruel and self-destructive. “If I could count the times Mother has said she hated me and didn’t have a daughter,” says B.
D., “I’d be in the very high numbers.” She stands to earn in the high numbers for her literary efforts (the advance was 0,000) but claims money was not a motive. “I could have written the manuscript and sent it to Mother and not published it. She won’t listen to anything she doesn’t want to hear. So I went the only route I felt would reach her: the public forum.
Such incriminations contribute to Hyman’s portrait of Davis as a mean-spirited, wildly neurotic, profane and pugnacious boozer who took out her anger at the world by abusing those close to her. Margot, institutionalized since 1954, came occasionally for visits. She would call her names like ‘stupid’ or ‘moron,’ ” says B. “Mother was a virgin when she married and always resented it,” says B. “She wanted to live vicariously through me.” Once, after 15-year-old B. came home from a date with George Hamilton, Bette asked: “Well? D., by insulting Jeremy and telling his wife he was having affairs. D., her sons Justin, now 7, and Ashley, 15, took their share of Bette’s abuse. After reportedly walloping Justin, then 4, on New Year’s Eve in 1982, she shut the boy up in a dark room and told him that “he better damn well stay in there and not try to come out till he’d learned his lesson.” Davis also turned on Ashley after encouraging him to make his acting debut with her in the 1981 TV movie Family Reunion.