Prove yourself dating
That fear of being abandoned, when it was realised, painful as it was it felt familiar.When they weren’t leaving, I started acting up, and then I could convince myself they’d leave anyway. It felt like a slap in the face and I smarted from her words but they stuck in my head for a very long time and in the end, I came to recognise the significance and truth of her words once my pride had settled down.
Every day I read stories in my email, read the comments, Facebook, and even general stories via my friends, acquaintances, and of course the media, and I feel deeply saddened that there are many women who are like how I have been, believing they have no options, or their option is someone who treats them ‘less than’.
It felt like a lot and that I was working for the relationship – I was running on the spot.
It suited me to think I was unlovable – It was like giving myself license to be resigned to dating assclowns.
When I became ill with the immune system sarcoidosis in 2003, I was so distracted by the ‘guy with a girlfriend’ that even though I should have been focusing on my health, I was more interested on focusing on him as my only option! This is how I ended up in a number of half hearted relationships and yawning my way through many dates.
It was only when I ditched him that it occurred to me to start fighting for my survival and opening up my options. I don’t think I’ve admitted this before, but the last chunk of my relationship with the guy with a girlfriend, I think I wanted to win more than I wanted him.
When you strip out the can’t, couldn’t, should, shouldn’t, won’t and other negativity impeding your belief of what you’re capable of doing, what you do for yourself today, tomorrow, the day after that and beyond?