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All I want is to quietly solve the problem by myself. So with all that in mind, you could sum it up by saying: I want her to give me space and I want her to be OK while she’s giving me space.All relationships are going to require moments where you give the guy space.I know I came across needy over the last couple of months and am wondering if there’s anything I can do to get him back. MORE: Why Guys Withdraw Men don’t want an audience for this.I can tell you firsthand that when people try to probe why I am being distant, it feels very invasive to me and I withdraw even further.It means that you are not imprisoned in a reality where you can’t be happy unless you get a very, specific outcome with one particular person.MORE: Everything You Need to Know to Get Your Ex Back When you fixate on a specific outcome with a specific person, you ruin your attractive vibe since you can’t be happy unless you have the outcome you want…I tried to be there for him but he totally withdrew and would reject my advances and we started fighting a lot because of it.
The fact is, relationships are not “things” that you could lose or gain. Relationships happen in-the-moment, as they’re happening. So you can’t “get it back” because there’s no thing to get. It is only the quality of experience that matters and the quality of your experience is determined by your perspective and mood.RECOMMENDED QUIZ: “Can I Get My Ex Back Or Is He Gone Forever?” Quiz All it means is that you trust that everything is going to work out for the best.At the heart of it, it’s the feeling of fear of loss.When you believe that you could lose something, you’ll instinctively shrink inside and it will take the wind out of your sails.
That doesn’t mean I think the person “probing” is a bad person or that they have a bad intent. I do want the woman I’m with to be OK though; I don’t want her to worry or be upset.